Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the Captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to Toronto. The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth, uneventful flight. So sit back, relax and... OH, MY GOD !' Silence followed! Some moments later the Captain came back on the PA; 'Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you. While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!' One Irish passenger yelled **** yours, you should see the back of mine! '